I’ve always been big busted. However during pregnancy, as you would expect, my boobs grew. And grew and grew and then grew some more. It didn’t bother me too much because I knew they would go back to the size they were once the pregnancy was over. That’s what’s supposed to happen, right?
Well it didn’t bloody happen to me! The last time I was pregnant is almost three years ago and my boobs are as big now as they were at the height of the pregnancies. If one more person tells me I’m lucky to have big boobs, I may just slap them in the face!
If you happen to be burdened, not blessed, with a big chest you’ll totally know what I’m talking about. And for those of you are aren’t, just be careful what you wish for! Let me enlighten you to a few very annoying things that happen to us big boobed people; things people with C cups just wouldn’t have a clue about.
The problem with big boobs: Bras
Bra’s are a pain in the arse. Not because I can’t find ones to fit because I can but the price of them would break your heart. Us big boobed people can’t just saunter in to Dunnes or Penneys and pick up a little lacy number and that includes their bigger cup sizes too. Well, I can’t anyway.
Why? Well there’s about as much support in them as there is for an alcoholic in a distillery! I have to go to actual lingerie shops, strip down and get measured. That’s not the problem but such garments, those for massive knockers, don’t come cheap. They are actually very expensive so I just buy essentials while the rest of you go round in your lovely cute matching sets from Penneys! Pain in the behind.
The problem with big boobs: Shirts
I like shirts, particularly those of the check variety. However, I have now given up on them, having flashed way to many cashiers in my local Lidl. I leave the house with all the buttons closed and I don’t buy shirts that gape across the boobs but they still end up open round the boob area. It drives me insane. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I went around in public with bits of my expensive bras peeking out. Now I just look longingly at lovely shirts in Zara that I can never buy.
The problem with big boobs: Swimwear
Much like my bra conundrum, getting suitable swimwear is a nuisance. Almost none of the swimwear in normal shops is underwired. Trust me, nobody with big boobs wants to inflict non-underwired knockers on anyone! A couple of years ago we all headed to Cambrils Park in Spain for our summer holliers and beforehand I thought I see if Asos had any nice bikinis or swimwear. They had loads. For teenagers! Jaysus, you’d want to have seen the state of some of them! Myself and my knockers would have been arrested if I went out in public in any of them! In the end I had to go to the fancy lingerie shop again and pay another small fortune for a black bikini and a black swimsuit! Sigh.
The problem with big boobs: Cross body bags
I love cross body bags. They are just handy, especially when I’m out and about with the kids because they free up my hands. Except when you have big boobs the strap nestles right in between each boob and makes them look even bigger. Anything that makes them look bigger is certainly not something I need. I recently got my picture taken with a cross body bag on and suffice to say that it didn’t make it’s way on to Instagram!
The problem with big boobs: Clothes
Actually buying clothes in general is a royal pain in the arse when you have big boobs! Strappy numbers are a big no-no. For me anyway. I’m not one for having them on show but I feel hard done by in the summer when all the pretty spaghetti strapped garments hit the rails.
Then there’s the times when I have to buy tops and dresses too big. They fit fine across the chest but are big everywhere else but I have no choice if I want to accommodate the big boobs!
So there’s my rant. I happen to be carrying a good few extra pounds too, which, in the past, contributed to the size of my knockers. When I knuckled down and lost weight I’d usually go down a cup size but since having kids that doesn’t happen anymore. They stay the same no matter how much weight I lose.
If I had the money, I would go under the knife; no doubt about it. And to those of you who happen to be blessed with little boobs – count those blessings! It’s much, much easier than having big ones!